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ride to the wilderness
The parking lot was pretty empty given the fact that it was the week-end, most student either taking advantage of their time off to go out and have fun, or stuck in a part time job. It left Shelby, Sy's gleaming blue, red and silver speed bike nicely showcased in the wide opened parking. The only thing he doubted at the moment was the cold, him and Haylen only wearing t-shirts for tops, when his leather jacket would keep the wind at bay.
No time and the dorm is too far.
I haven't taken her out for a ride in a little while now.
Last time was with Isolde.
He winced at the idea as he was still dragging Haylen along by the hand, speed walking due to his anticipation level. His eyes were practically making love to the approaching vehicle.
"Isn't she a beauty?" he asked the second they were only a few feet away, stopping and letting go of Haylen's hand to caress the cool metal of it.
His expression turned to something more serious when he saw the bag still hanging onto the bike's side. He had been so perturbed last he took Shelby out, devastated by that sour ending date, that he'd left his helmet bag with the bike.
That's VERY irresponsible.
I'm friggin' lucky it's still there.
Those are expensive.
I guess the ugly cloth bag doesn't bring too much attention though.
He went around her, his fingertips stroking her designs and the leather of her seat as he walked along, admiring and almost communing with it. Bikes were his one true passion, he could never get enough and whenever he raced the wind, he was free.
Breaking that silent contact, he looked to Haylen, studying his face...and maybe a little more, but he tried to keep that for himself. Mainly, he wanted to know if he could share his passion with his lover. Not that he could call him that out loud yet.
"And? Think you can come for a ride with me?" he asked, hopeful.
The sheer expression of pride and delight on Simon's face was enough to make Haylen muster a warm little smile of his own, eyeing the bike with curious eyes.
It was damn cool-looking, he couldn't lie. Its colorful surfaces reflected the sun, and intricate designs decorated the fine leather seat. Though he knew little about motorbikes, Haylen could tell that this one was one to be more than happy with.
"That's pretty awesome," he muttered under his breath, watching as Simon circled around the bike, running his hand over the shiny surfaces as though he were part of it. "I've never been on one, but my..."
He wasn't a friend.
You talked to him all of two times.
"...someone I knew back home used to ride one. His was black, though, and made obnoxiously loud roaring noises every time he came to a stop. It looked badass, but I dunno. I wouldn't wanna drive something that sounded like it was gonna friggin' explode." Haylen managed a laugh and became hopeful when Simon spoke up.
"And? Think you can come for a ride with me?"
"Heh, always," he replied with a devious wink, wondering what he was supposed to do. He sure wasn't just about to mount the bike without Simon's instructions.
I don't wanna break something, oh god. If I broke his bike, everything would just go down the drain. Clearly he likes this thing.
He assumed that perhaps Simon would hand him a helmet or something, because he sure as hell wasn't gonna ride a friggin' motorbike without something to protect his skull, at the very least.
"So uhh..." He stood unsurely on the opposite side of the bike from Simon, gazing into the taller boy's eyes. "I have no idea what I'm doing here."
For once.
Ha, ha. So funny.
Haylen secretly wished he had something he'd be able to show Simon in return, but really, he had nothing. He considered the things he liked to do.
Hm. Let's see.
Drawing is alright. But I don't think he'd appreciate what I draw. It's some pretty weird shit.
I like singing, but... not gonna happen.
And then... I guess you can't really count sitting at the Starbucks on the corner and seeing how many dead birds there are on the sidewalks.
...hm.
Seriously...?
This is pathetic. The only thing I ever have to offer is my body. The only thing I'm good at is fulfilling other people's desires. I should just go live on a street corner already with all of the other wasted skeletons.
...Oh, stop with the pity party and get on the friggin' bike.
Haylen took his conscience's advice and swung one leg over the leather seat of the bike, hoping he was doing everything right.
This is the first and last time I'll ever be hesitant when proceeding to straddle something--
Awh, dude. Just stop.
Adorable. Just adorable. He couldn't pin point what was so endearing about Haylen whenever he appeared somewhat, or completely helpless, but it always got to him. It always brought on the urge to be close to the boy. He nodded with a smile, pulling a dark blue helmet with tribal white designs on it and handed it to Haylen who was already waiting for him on the back seat of his precious Shelby.
"You can start by putting that on your head."
The second Haylen took the helmet, he pulled out one with the same white designs but red at the base, pulling it over his head until all you could see was his shaded green eye from behind the tinted plasti-glass. By hurrying his helmet on, he hoped Haylen would be able to just copy, not needing any help with the strap under the chin.
Apparently it worked, both of them soon geared up and ready to go. With a steady swing of his leg, he straddled the bike and started the engine, the bike coming to life with a smooth purr. There was no noticeable hesitation, not that Simon managed to notice anyways. Therefore, why hesitate? He grabbed Haylen's arms and pulled them around himself so that they would be in a sort of close embrace.
"Hold on tight!"
With a smug smirk, he kicked the stand off the ground, reved the engine and spinned the tires a little before taking off with a kick. A laugh rumbled loudly out of his throat as they picked up speed exiting the school's property. The feel of the wind whipping at his bare arms wasn't close to enough to stop the fire in him, that excitement and impression that the world was his...better today, for the world was theirs.
"Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"
His scream of joy was followed by another session of laughter, but he hadn't completely lost control, not yet. He still was concerned with his partner's safety, slowing down as a tight curb approached, enough to lower the sound of the engine so that Haylen would hear him speak in his forceful voice.
"When we hit the curve, make sure to lean along with me to keep the weight steady. Just feel my body and mesh with it, follow it. You're normally damn good at that!" he laughed, playfully. "Same thing!"
With a snarky grin, Haylen wrapped his arms tightly around Simon's chest, jerking his hips forward to knock against the lowest vertebrae of the redhead's spine. "How's that for 'meshing' and 'following'?" he said in his honey-covered voice.
The bike roared around the bend at a pace so fast that even Haylen felt a little winded, gripping helplessly at Simon's tee. Wind ripped through his hair and whipped it in his face, drying his eyes and mouth. It was almost overwhelming, but something about the whole experience felt so... freeing.
This is insane.
We're riding a friggin' motorbike at a friggin' boarding school.
And it's actually somewhat exciting. Fun. Whatever.
How bizarre.
Haylen didn't want it to end. He pressed soft kisses to the back of Simon's neck as they made their way further down the road, clouds of dust being kicked up by the bike's wheels.
Silently, he wondered how far he could convince Simon to drive. He knew that going off campus could get them in huge trouble, but... they'd be alone, and it wouldn't be their dorm room.
"Do you think," he began, his voice just loud enough to hear over the rumble of the motor, "do you think that we could like... ride somewhere.. further away? I mean, we don't have to, but we'd be so alone..."
We shouldn't.
Knowing my fabulous record, I'll get expelled, and he'll get in trouble.
Which would mean I'd have to go back home.
And he'd have to go somewhere, too. Not home.
Shit, that wouldn't be good.
Haylen rethought his suggestion, but didn't correct it out loud. Instead, he rested his cheek against Simon's back, clinging to the other boy with both intent and care. He felt... safe. Secure.
He honestly hoped that they could get as far away from the rest of the school as possible - maybe not off-campus, but surely in a far corner of the property where no one really lurked.
"Go faster," he urged in a breathy tone, not really realizing that his words sounded more suggestive than he'd intended. "I want to get away from everything."
Simon could do little more than smile under his helmet, looking to the pavement quickly rolling from the view ahead to under the wheels he was guiding. He shared this wish of Haylen to get away from this place, and as for speeding up, he was just thankful to have someone with as much guts as himself on the bike, turning the right handle back a notch.
"Hold on tight!" he warned for a second time.
The engine revved loudly, the front wheel lifting, bucking up the bike a little before landing and taking off with an extra kick. The yellow began to defile at such a speed it looked like a full line. He drove around the properties, passing the subway and sport complex, going around the few slow drivers lingering on the road until he saw the sign signaling the exit of the lot. There was some mild hesitation as he got near it.
We could get in trouble.
We'd have to be caught though.
If I don't go far...
Taking a deep breath, he gather all ounce of boldness he gather and headed straight ahead. There was a strange sense of relief as he exited the lot, looking around for a place to go. The place was a little distant from the big cities, the road rather bare, surrounded by trees and fields, surely a way to avoid the students from being tempted into skipping to town. Sadly, it hadn't been enough for these two guys.
To his left Simon saw a little dirt road that lead into a forest of thick bushy trees, still holding enough leaves to give them cover them. Ignoring the private property sign, he slowed down, taking the sharp turn and and going at a comfortable speed on the rough path. He made sure to be far enough from the road to be unnoticed and that he wasn't close to the house of the owner. He stopped the engine, putting a foot down to balance the bike, removing his helmet and revealing a messy mass of rust colored hair.
"Well, I think we can hide the bike behind the bushes here. Hope this place is alright. I'm not much of a camper but at least there isn't anyone here."
He twisted his torso to look back to Haylen, who him too had removed his own helm. He smiled when he saw the how tousled his chocolate strands were, giving the boy a rather innocent look he normally didn't have. Almost like a habit, he stretched his arm and placed his fingers behind Haylen's neck, gently pulling him into a kiss. His lips and tongue began to play on the boy, the heat quickly beginning to invade him, making him forget to focus on his balance, the bike suddenly sway.
He let go of Haylen, eyes wide with a "ooooh" of surprise, unable to regain control of the falling bicycle, the heavy vehicle tipping to the right. Not wanting either of them to be crushed, he grabbed onto Haylen, wrapping both arms around him and forcing them to fall a bit further, making sure to act as cushion for him, the bike landing on the soft dirt ground, Simon on his back in the dirt and leaves, well under Haylen.
Blinking a few times to avoid the dirt in the air, he looked to Haylen, concerned.
"Are you ok?"
Though it hadn't been the way he'd been planning getting off of the bike, Haylen was rather content with how things ended up. Despite the vehicle tipping over and so lovingly dumping he and Simon to the dirt, Haylen found himself perched contently atop a dust-covered redhead.
"I'm probably more than okay," he decided, leaning down to press a light kiss to Simon's chin.
For a moment, Haylen couldn't help but peel his eyes from Simon to look around a bit. They'd ended up somewhere not terribly far from campus, but far enough for some true peace and quiet and solitary.
Gnarled trees loomed above their heads, barely letting any rays of sunlight through their thick branches. Pleasant shadows were scattered upon the grassy, leaf-covered ground, and the mildest of breeze swept through the whole area.
Being from the grimiest corners of the inner city, such a fresh and natural environment proved itself to be quite ideal to Haylen. Something about being alone in an autumn woodland was utterly comforting, and Haylen felt even more at ease than he had on the bike.
He didn't feel obligated to think or worry about anything, and his mind was momentarily free of all bitter memories, Matt and his mother dwelling in the very back of his thoughts. There were no no standards to live up to, no pressure to collapse under. And the fact that Simon was with him always helped.
Putting aside the horribly sour start, the day was turning out nicely.
What a change.
A good change.
I could deal with this more often.
"I'm so glad to be able to get away from that school for a little while," Haylen admitted, collapsing in half to rest his weary head on Simon's chest. "Sometimes it's just so overwhelming, everything that goes on. I think too much. I worry too often. I reminisce about things that haunt me, and I have terrible nightmares. But out here, it's different, you know? It's just so much more relaxed and nice. Even if we aren't supposed to be out here. But it's not that far from school..."
With his rambling, Haylen felt like he was almost intruding on the unspoken truce of beautiful serenity that occupied the whole space. So instead of talking, he nuzzled warmly against Simon, just breathing and listening.
He heard his ragged breaths and Simon's smooth ones merge into one steady rythm, Simon's very audible heartbeat and his own barely-there one fall into sync. He listened to the chilly breeze as it sang its way through the stray leaves on the ground, making them rustle and shift. He listened to each induvidual blade of grass as it swayed in the shadows, dancing to some unheard melody.
He felt completely... satisfied.
How odd. Satisfaction is rare.
Yeah. It'll only last so long.
So live it up.
"Thanks, Sy," Haylen whispered, not entirely sure why he said it, or if it was necessary or appropriate. But it felt right, it felt right. Everything felt right, even if only for this one instant.
Worry quickly washed itself away, no injuries and no problems. Just two people in the middle of a scarce forest, under the coloring leaves. It was nice, to hear him talk like this. Openly, freely, a little bit randomly. It gave Simon a smile, but not the kind that appears on one's lips, the type which remains inside, that you feel in your heart and show through your eyes alone.
So with silence, he accepted Haylen's gratitude and savored the moment, his lover well tucked on his chest, his arms now wrapped around him. He closed his eyes and let some time run by, relaxing with the wind's lullaby, a chorus of leaves, dancing branches under the golden rays of the autumn sun. It was nice, more than nice, heavenly. Part of him wanted things to just freeze in the way they were, etched into a timeless canvas, never needing to face reality again, surrounded with picturesque scenes, lulled by tranquility and warmed by the body of the boy he cared for. Here, now, he didn't need a family, he was accepted by the only other person here and by nature, he didn't need to put up pretenses.
A knot eventually formed in his stomach, causing this perfection to end, a painful mass of realization, that it just couldn't be like this forever. Just the need to accept that this would end was hard, the strain of the early day back. He wondered if he'd ever heal fully.
I don't want to disturb Haylen.
I...
I can't let him see me cry again.
A few tears fell from his eyes, but he was able to hold back the sobs, keeping his little moment of pain unnoticed, preferring it this way, for now. Even if he was unaware of it, he felt glad to have Haylen here with him, cuddled up that way, to not be alone. He needed to move, to be distracted again. He gave a little thankful squeeze, flexing his arms just a little around Haylen before raising both hands to wipe his eyes, mimicking sleepiness to camouflage the tears, forcing out a yawn, hoping to use that to explain the mild moisture lingering at the corners of his eyelids.
"As nice as this is, we better hide Shelby...I mean the bike before we get caught."
The moment Haylen was off him he pushed himself up and walked over to her, lying in the dirt. A new wave of concern that hadn't phased him before pushed his worries back to his field of repressed emotions, lifting the motorcycle and examining it attentively. There soon was a sigh of relief escaping his lips.
"No scratch. It wasn't pavement and she fell rather slowly." he stated as if talking about a person.
He then looked to Haylen, not surprised to see a cocked up eyebrow on the boy's face, blushing slightly. He usually got some kind of strange reaction when he spoke of his bike. But he couldn't help it. It was more than an object to him.
One more thing that makes me weird.
Damn.
Not that I'm about to change that though.
"Hum....help me hide it? Please."
Together, they pushed the vehicle off the trail, the effort nothing very demanding. They took no time at all to tuck her in a bush, only a few feet away from the trail.
Hmmm... if we go and walk around, we might have trouble find the bike back.
Troublesome.
Maybe if I....
He raised an index to Haylen, common sign for saying 'one minute' or 'wait' and jogged back to the side of the trail. Picking a fairly large tree and rather big stone of the road, he scratched a mark in the bark. The trail, he knew he'd find again, and now, they'd just have to look for that mark. He jogged back to Haylen, looking more casual, his moment of sadness now forgotten.
He stood in front of Haylen, both hands in his pockets, his weight supported by how his hips leaned to the right, shoulders relaxed, laid back and pulling his chest up a little under his tight black shirt, a kind of posture you see in those Ralph Lauren ads. The rusty strands on his head swayed a little with the rhythm of the wind. Even his smile and the look in his eyes spelled out seduction, though all of it was unintentional, he wasn't showing off. No, he was actually the one doing the admiration, looking to Haylen almost adoringly, earning him the boy's discomfort. He could see from Haylen's shifty eyes that he still was uneasy being appreciated, and he gave Simon a little chuckle, before nodding and walking the few steps between them, keeping his hands nicely tucked in his jean's pockets.
"Let's go for a walk, explore the place a bit. Okay?"
"Sounds good," Haylen agreed, his eyes fixed on Simon's impeccable body. Everything from his freckles to his formfitting black top to the way he stood with swayed hips was just so enticing to Haylen, and he had a hard time from keeping his slack mouth shut. "Let's go."
He's sexy.
I really shouldn't be thinking that right now, during this nice peaceful little moment, but he is.
Holy hell.
The two boys made their way deeper into the canopy of trees, colorful leaves crackling beneath their feet. As he looked up and through the branches, Haylen took notice that the sky was rapidly growing darker and greyer, and the sun was retreating behind a patch of silver-black clouds.
"Looks like there's gonna be a storm," Haylen said, carefully stepping over a fallen log while glancing sideways at Simon. The other boy didn't seem to have a problem with it, so Haylen continued on, surprised when they came to a clearing in the woods.
In front of them lay a small circular patch of lush green grass, intermixed with long wild grains and pretty purple weeds. The little bit of light that shed through the stormclouds hit only one area, acting like a spotlight. It was surrounded by twisted tree trunks covered in orange and red and yellow leaves, and was so pretty that it looked like it could be out of a movie.
With a sweep of nostalgia and a childish grin, Haylen bolted to the center of the clearing, standing where the sliver of sunlight touched down. "C'mon, Sy!" he urged, gesturing for Simon to join him. With little hesitation, the ginger-haired boy was beside Simon, wearing a matching grin of utter contentment.
This is the weirdest day.
I feel like a stupid kid.
Ah, it's fun. Whatever.
As though it had been waiting for the two boys to be vulnerable, the rain came tumbling from the clouds in heavy torrents, dripping down Haylen's smooth cheeks and quickly saturating his white shirt. Before long, his hair hung in glossy clumps in front of his eyes, and his tee was wet to the point of being see-through and literally clinging to his every muscle. His jeans were almost too heavy for him to lift his legs, but he proceeded to twirl around anyway, laughing beneath the downpour.
"I love when it rains during the autumn," he confessed, cold drops falling into his open mouth. He grabbed Simon by the wrist and tackled him to the ground, mud splashing up when they landed in the grass.
We're gonna get back to school and be completely filthy.
Mmm.
Haylen placed his palms on Simon's shoulders, pushing him against the waterlogged ground. Without putting much thought into his actions, he pressed his stomach to Sy's, arcing his spine and letting out a breathy little chuckle.
"You're pretty hot when you're all wet like this," he murmured, bending over to kiss the other boy's rain-slicked lips. "And I'm not gonna lie, this makes me like the rain even more."
You're such a whore.
Yes, you just realized?
"I don't want this to get too... evolved," Haylen said, laying down the rules before running his hands down Simon's damp shirt until he reached the bottom hem. "But you didn't honestly expect me to spend this whole time out here, all alone with you, without doing something, right?"
Before waiting for any sort of reply, Haylen situated his cheek against Simon's bare collarbone, teasing his lips against the redhead's neck. Once again, that sweet-musky taste tingled his tongue, this time mingled with the crisp taste of rainwater. The hard-hitting raindrops were falling quickly and with a lot of force, pounding against Haylen's bony back.
The entire circumstance was just exhilarating - the unforgiving rain, the privacy, the feeling of gratification that rested inside Haylen's chest.
I could do this all day.
Obviously.
The set up was sensually ideal, rain drops making the boy's skin glisten under the greying light. Their hair kissed the muscles around each of their necks and jaw, dripping more water along their faces, droplets gathering at their lips, enhancing their call to be kissed, felt.
I'm all dirty now...
he he
he he he...
Haylen's mouth playing at the bottom of his neck, Sy placed his hand in Haylen's wet mane of soft chocolate hair, a shivering pulse twitching his fingers into clenching around the loose strands, tilting his head back into the damp earth. His mouth opened in gaping pleasure, he welcomed the rain keeping his tongue hydrated, making the panting easier to do. It really was the ideal setting for this kind of kinky game.
The beauty of enjoying sensual activities with someone that is special to you, is that the rawness of it can be pleasantly tainted with all pleasures of the life's palette. Hence when Simon pushed Haylen off him with every intention to simply roll over, transferring the position of authority, his hand slipped and he slid most ungracefully over Haylen. Had it been a one time person, someone he wasn't himself with, a first, he would have been most uncomfortably embarrassed. But now, he was simply taken by the purest form of joyful laughter, his eyes glowing vibrant with a perfect mixture of lust, affection and happiness, which was more life than they'd communicated in a while. His laughter quickly infected Haylen, both grinning as they kissed.
With a playful mood to him, fueled by the pleasant coolness of the rain keeping his back wet and fresh, he lowered himself, his head to the level of Haylen's abdomen, lifting his shirt, at first kissing it smoothly, before letting out an amused chuckle, tickling him lightly and kissing him all the same, torturing the boy with body sensitivity.
After a short time of mild teasing, Simon pushed himself up, sitting just above Haylen's knees and grabbed the boy by the collar, pulling him up in a rather passionate kiss, lifting Haylen's shirt, having trouble separating his lips from Haylen's to pass the shirt over his head, putting the drenched top beside them before kissing him again, vigorously. The heat was quickly rising and he managed to take a moment of distance, wanting to do something before loosing the clarity of mind to do so. He removed his own shirt and wrapping his arms around Haylen, laid the fabric flat on the ground behind Haylen. As kinky as he could be, there were some parts of him he felt a little unwilling to cover in mud, and wouldn't inflict it on Haylen either.
Time of a breath later, he was again laying over Haylen, his tongue, nibbles and lips brushing the line of his lover's jaw. Remote, private and away from their troubles, they could enjoy the simple pleasures of life. Lustful sloths, they were indulging in denial.
Self-indulgent and bursting with desire, Haylen and Simon kissed in an almost violent manner, eager to taste each other to the very core. If they weren't the personification of the deadly sin of lust, Haylen didn't know who was.
He tore away for just long enough to get in a few gulps of breath, locking his arms around Simon and forcing the other boy closer against him. He didn't want any space, not a single inch, to be between their bodies. He didn't need anything more than Simon's irresistible touch and greedy lips and the delicious friction of their rain-coated torsos moving together.
With a blissful moan and a jerk of his hips, Haylen found himself completely lost in a fantasy land, forgetting to care about the things that usually plagued his thoughts. He was completely and totally wrapped up in how Simon's body felt above him - the chisled muscles of his upper body, the rough denim of his jeans against Haylen's lower stomach.
"Ugh... shit, Sy..." Words couldn't express the feeling of utter ecstasy that was pounding through Haylen's heated system, so he instead opted for moans, sighs, and senseless obscenities, writhing in pleasure beneath Simon.
This is disgusting.
I keep dragging him into making out with me when we could be perfectly happy just talking or thinking or walking through the woods.
...But what fun would that be?
The beads of hot perspiration that formed on Haylen's temples were mixed and washed away with the relentless downpour, salt mixing with rainwater. "Simon," he rasped, struggling for air, "we can't let this.. get too far-"
I can't believe I'm the one saying this.
I'm just gonna shut up and let it go. We're free. This is our moment. Ours. Alone.
And we can do whatever the hell we want with it.
Ceasing his speech only to occupy his lips with something far more interesting, Haylen urged Simon to straighten up, grinning when the redhead complied and straddled his slender waist. It was a set-up that was practically begging for trouble - gorgeous, milk-skinned Simon perched atop Haylen's scrawny bronze hips.
"C'mon, baby," he murmured, sitting up just enough to kiss along the bare expanse of Simon's tummy. "You take a breather for a minute and... let me do some of the work."
It's hardly 'work'.
It's more like playtime. Leisure.
Delicious, delicious leisure.
Getting straight to his so-called 'labor', Haylen dug his fingernails into the small of Simon's back, pressing hard to ensure that there'd be little purple cresent-shaped marks tomorrow morning. He grinned as he nuzzled his cheek across Simon's ribcage, flicking out his tongue sideways on the white skin.
A shudder ran up Haylen's spine, goosebumps rising on his arms as shockwaves of pleasure crashed through his body. Even if he was the one doing everything for right now, he was still completely dissolved in the grips of rapture and euphoria.
I should probably stop soon, before this gets out of hand.
But oh god, no, it's too..
fun...
Haylen felt like he was a puppet, controlled by the strings of lust and lust alone. He kissed blindly down Simon's side, nipping playfully at the other boy's pale complexion when he reached the dent of his waist. His frail arms were slung loosely about Simon's middle, slowly slipping down due to the slick rain.
With little effort, he leveled himself to Simon, slipping his legs out from underneath the redhead and instead kneeling in front of him. He could feel the other boy's sticky breath fuse with his own, their mouths mere inches apart. "Kiss me," he demanded, in a voice so thick with yearning that he could hardly recognize it as his own.
If he had first requested to keep the situation under control, Haylen sure had been sending mixed signals. By now the boy should know better of Simon's power of resistance against him, or his lack of it. Every inch of Haylen's body was a call to submission, his musk a fuel to his lust and his presence, the aura and the way he moved, sounded, his warmth and everything was just a prison Simon failed to wish to escape.
Still drunken by the heavy dose of pheromones in the air, there was no way he could deny a request such as this one, tantalizing, demanding, echoing a carnal need that just couldn't be denied. His lips met Haylen's in a clash of moisture, enhanced by the taste and texture of the cool rain adding to the caress of their fingers. His lips raced against one another, eagerly tasting each other.
The passion and vigor of their kiss and embrace grew in intensity to a point Simon had never dreamt possible. His longing grew so deep, his need too intense that he feared he would collapse, a passion so great it literally ached.
His heart pounding so frantically Sy dreaded it would bruise against the bones of his rib cage and his tensed-over heaving lungs. He grabbed Haylen's head with both hands, parting his lips from his, resting his forehead on the boy's. His eyes closed, he allowed himself a few second to try and control his breathing again before giving any length of explanation.
"Stop...I think that's too much."
No matter how good it was, such intense emotions only rekindled the pain of his recent loss, merging pleasure, lust, desire, all needs, carnal and emotional along with grief and despair. It was simply more than he could take, and he needed it stop. To take some distance. His state of mind was temporarily betrayed by the tremble of his bare shoulders, a few little small noisy gasps escaping his throat, unable to hold them in due to his still heavy panting.
Letting go of Haylen, he stood up, turning his back to the boy and bringing his wrist to cover his mouth and nose, muffling hence forth some sobs. He was so tired of crying and hurting it was making him sick. And yet, the tears still poured.
It's just rain.
I have to stop this.
Closing his eyes, focusing on his breathing which began to slow down, he attempted talking again, but the only thing his voice permitted was a mumbled "M'sorry.". And yet, he began to heal himself, his own determination fueling him enough to stop his own tears, the saline instantly wash by the slowing rain.
I can make it on my own.
That's right, I'm not alone.
And even if I was...
I'd have to move out in a year anyways.
Just a new start.
I can do this.
He turned to Haylen, looking apologetic with a raised brow, biting the inside of his lips, silently asking for forgiveness and patience. He just, couldn't do this whole physical thing right now. He would probably burst, cry like a baby in the middle of their session, and he couldn't face that. He liked Haylen, a lot. But he hadn't yet reached a level of comfort far enough to allow himself this much. He just needed a bit of time, keep it light and fun for now.
The mere expression that Simon wore on his face was more than enough to make Haylen's tough outer shell crumble at least a little bit. Normally he wouldn't have allowed the other boy to cut things off so quickly, but he appeared to be in need of a little break from the overwhelming attention.
"You don't have to friggin' apologize," Haylen said with a little laugh, still struggling to completely gain his composer and calm down. "You didn't do anything wrong. Here, c'mere. Let's go."
The rain was slowly letting up, only a few little sprinkles coming from above, and picking up their shirts, Haylen led Simon back into the forest. It was significantly drier beneath the protection of the thick leaf canopy above their head, and since the ground seemed relatively dry beneath them, Haylen flopped down, beginning to feel the after-effects of being drenched with autumnal rain. He shivered as the cold water seemed to seep right into his skin and cuddled up next to Sy, both of them sitting against the gnarled trunk of a vine-wrapped oak tree.
"I forgot that we'd have to wait for our shirts to dry," Haylen confessed, his teeth chattering. Now that he wasn't being kept warm by the heat of the moment, the stormy winds were whipping against his skin like chains of ice. "And my body has the worst temperature regulation. I'm so friggin' cold."
Stop whining.
Suck it up.
Resting his wet cheek against Simon's equally as moist shoulder, Haylen sighed softly, the release of air feeling rather necessary. He felt like he hadn't taken a single breath since before their bike ride. For the rest of the day, up until this moment, everything had gone by in a blur and he hadn't had time to really think about much, let alone take time to just exhale and take in the fresh fall air.
The situation was rather nice, even despite Haylen's chilliness - they were shielded by the abundant amounts of trees, branches, and leaves, and there was a slight pitter-patter of the few raindrops that were still drizzling down. The cushion of fallen golden and red leaves and pine needles was an ideal cushion to sit on, and the smooth bark of the oak tree was forgiving against the frail skin of their backs.
And then there was the fact that Haylen was with Simon, which, as of late, could make any event seem that much more bearable.
He didn't know what was going on.
There was no denying that he liked Simon, at least. But to be able to tell him such in a way that wasn't purely physical? Haylen couldn't do it. He wouldn't be able to find or form the words. He wouldn't know how to even bring it up. He'd have to take a risk, to let go of the reins, to let control slip from his grasp for a moment.
And he wasn't sure he was willing to do just that.
Pushing the heavier thoughts from his mind, Haylen concentrated on how peaceful this moment was.
The way Simon was breathing made his shoulders rise oh-so-slightly, which in turn caused Haylen's head to bob up and down in the tiniest bit, a barely-there lulling motion that was enough to make him want to sleep.
"I like it like this, you know?" Haylen mumbled, his eyelids fluttering so that they were almost completely shut. "I like when it's just us."
Sweet christ.
Stop with the gooey shit.
It's disgusting.
I feel like such a girl.
He huddled a little closer to the redhead, smiling when Sy wrapped a strong arm around his waist and kissed the top of his head. In return he planted a soft peck to the dip where Simon's collarbone met his shoulder, and then proceeded to go back to resting calmly and happily against the other boy.
Sy couldn't help but smile, holding Haylen as warm as he could, cuddled against his bare chest and wrapped withing his arms, loosely leaning on the harsh bark of a large tree trunk. Things were more calm, the wind being one of the few remaining sound around them.
Even in the cold his eyelids began to falter, feeling heavy and difficult to keep open. But seriously, why fight it? The rain had gradually come to a stop, the only drops falling on him were the few droplets gathered on the tree branches above his head, crashing down whenever a gust of wind would sway them.
The sun soon piercing a few shy rays through the clouds, clearing the sky and rendering the air somewhat more comfortable, enough to send both boys to the Sand man's land, dozing in a short, well deserved nap. Neither of them had moved even an inch, the place and position not enough to yet allow deep slumbers, thus that is often crowded by strange or scary dreams.
It was a chirping bird, choosing a place right by their heads to grant nature its song which woke Simon and Haylen. Stretching best he could under Haylen, Sy let out a deep rooted yawn, returning his consciousness to reality.
Guess we fell asleep.
What time is it?
Taking his arm off Haylen to look at the time on his brown leather bracelet watch, Sy felt a shiver from Haylen on him, having ripped his body warmth away. He couldn't help but smirk inwardly knowing the same fate awaited him the moment the boy would lift his torso. The thought didn't linger though.
"Oh shit, it's already two o'clock! We slept over an hour!"
The office closes at five.
Better hurry!
In no time both boys were up, grappling for their now dry shirts and hurrying into them, welcoming the little shelter they offered. Sadly enough, jeans didn't dry that fast, and even though they weren't all that wet anymore, they weren't exactly comfortable to walk in. Well, it's not like he had anything else to wear with him, he'd just have to endure.
"Let's go. I need to stop at the office..."
I should tell him why.
I will, after.
I don't have to report to him though.
I somehow, kinda wish I did.
mmm
They hurried down the trail, the wind picking up again under the rather brighter sky. As beautiful as fall could be, right now, it also proved able to be harsh. It was near winter after all. Their jeans' cold and damp material hugged their thighs as they jogged down the trail, taking little time to find the bike again and straddle it, helmet on their head. Simon heeded a warning before taking off.
"This ride is not gonna be fun like the last one."
The motorcycle kicked into gear, the wind hitting them full face. Now, he truly regretted not having a jacket or something warmer to wear, the cold air lashing at him without remorse, making his skin dry up in frost bites, aching as he sped up, wanting this ride over soon. As much as he enjoyed riding, there was nothing pleasant about this trip. Even the water left in his jeans felt like it was freezing over, making it this much more difficult to remain in full control, requiring more focus and energy than usual. Luckily for him, Haylen had learned quick how to be a passenger on this fairly dangerous vehicle, leaning on the right time, and meshing well with the motions, even though Sy could easily feel the boy shivering against his own quivering back.
They reached the parking lot soon enough, hurrying off the engine, brining the helmets inside as they rushed to their dorm rooms
